


Flora

by Spinalx



Category: GOT7
Genre: Hanahaki Disease, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-27
Updated: 2015-12-27
Packaged: 2018-05-09 20:28:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5554166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spinalx/pseuds/Spinalx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The morning that he woke up coughing into his fist and saw red rose petals on his sheets, he was okay. It wasn’t really normal, but it wasn’t going to be the end of the world. He was not the first person to get the Hanahaki disease. And he wasn’t the first person that had to deal with coughing up flower petals.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Flora

Mark was okay.

The morning that he woke up coughing into his fist and saw red rose petals on his sheets, he was okay. It wasn’t really normal, but it wasn’t going to be the end of the world. He was not the first person to get the Hanahaki disease. And he wasn’t the first person that had to deal with coughing up flower petals.

He wasn’t even the first person in Got7 to deal with the disease.

No. That honor actually went to Jaebum when he was pining after Jinyoung. But, all he had ever coughed up were little delicate white petals. Jinyoung had been really worried about him, and had tried to nurse Jaebum to health. Their love grew, and the flowers eventually stopped coming. Jaebum had explained that the best feeling was the plant slowly lessening into something warm and small inside of him.

If it wasn’t for the unrequited love turning into requited love, Jaebum would have ended up having to have surgery to remove the plant. Because apparently, Hanahaki Disease was actually fatal if left to it’s own devices for too long.

After waking up to the rose petals on his bed, Mark decided to do some research on his options. Because he was realistic about love. And he knew that his object of affection was never going to return the love.

Jackson was the person that he loved more than anything. But, Jackson was happy with a girl that he had met a few months ago when he was back in Hong Kong. A girl. That was the very beginning point of Mark’s reluctance to do or say anything about his developing feelings. The fact that the couple had been together for longer than a month, had him stopping all together.

Mark couldn’t do that to Jackson. Mark couldn’t say anything that could potentially ruin their friendship and put doubt into Jackson’s first real relationship. He would absolutely not do that to her or to Jackson. He would not make Jackson feel guilted into loving him. That probably wouldn’t actually count as requited love, either.

The idea of the other male loving him, was a stupid fantasy.

A low sigh escaped Mark as he scrolled through the information for the disease. The surgery was apparently pretty low risk. At least compared to other surgeries based around the lungs and heart. That, by itself, sounded like it wouldn’t be that horrible of an idea. It didn’t seem to take all that long to heal from the surgery. So, realistically, he could do it between promotions for Got7.

However, he froze slightly as he read that the feelings for that person would be gone. Sometimes it was all the memories of that person. Sometimes it was just the love that they had.

Maybe Mark was just a selfish person. Or maybe he didn’t want to feel that giant gaping hole inside of him. That was what he was certain that not loving Jackson would feel like. He couldn’t handle it. He was selfish, probably. But he needed those feelings, even if they hurt him a lot.

So, he would just keep everything quiet. He could keep it to himself.

~*~

 

“You kind of look like shit, dude,” Jackson stated, situating himself across from Mark at the main table. Jackson reached out, stealing some of the milk and one of the boxes of marshmallow cereal that were scattered on the table. The rest of the group had eaten and were off in other parts in the dorm, doing their own thing. But ever since Mark had started coughing up petals, he’d had a harder time eating.

So, he was trying to desperately attempting to stuff food down his throat, and keep himself from getting sick. Because he knew what he would throw up would be red rose petals.

Since that first morning that he had woken up, the disease only seemed to have gotten worse. It seemed as though every single time that Mark was around Jackson, he could feel the rose plant twisting tighter around his insides.

“Thanks. You’re always full of kind words for me,” Mark said sarcastically.

Considering that Jackson and Mark shared a room together, it was getting harder and harder for Mark to sleep. It was hard to breathe at night with Jackson so close to him, only about three feet away.

He tried hard to make it so that not much changed in their friendship. They still hung out during free time. They played video games and teased each other frequently. Jackson still woke Mark up in the middle of the night to talk about very random things.

Nothing really changed, but Mark hurt a lot more.

He couldn’t look at Jackson without feeling completely lost and desperate. His heart hurt whenever Jackson announced that he needed some private time to skype his girlfriend. Bambam would make lewd comments and tease Jackson.

“Are you sick though?” Jackson asked, his voice much softer.

“I don’t know. I might be,” Mark replied. It was winter after all. Mark had a history of getting ill during the winter without fail. Every year that they had been together, he had gotten sick for about two weeks and was an utter pain in the ass. Sitting there, he decided that he could milk the sick excuse as to why he looked so pale.

“Drink a lot of fluids. And stay away from me. Because I relaly don’t want to catch another one of the colds that you get. I thought I was going to die last year,” Jackson said, finishing his cereal. He got up, and pressed a warm kiss against the top of Mark’s head.

For a second, Mark just melted into the small motion. He allowed himself to believe that it was something more than it really was. His stomach was churning and he knew that he would have to dash to a bathroom. He was going to bask in the few moments that he could delude himself into believing Jackson could love him.

~*~

It took about three weeks for someone to realize that something was really wrong with Mark. Mainly because the boy had started buying a lot of red roses to keep in his room. He figured that if anyone saw petals, they’d just assume it came from the bouquets of roses. It was pretty genius, if he did say so himself.

Somehow, in those three works, he managed to keep himself in check around the others. He felt so weak that sometimes he fumbled in his dancing. Everyone blamed it on him just being sick. No one questioned how long it had been since he had gotten ill.

He was getting worse, no one seemed to notice it for the most part though.

That was, until Jaebum came into his room one night when Jackson was elsewhere, and sat down.

“I think I know what’s going on with you,” Jaebum murmured, brushing some of the Mark’s blond hair out of his eyes. He didn’t seem to be bothered by how sweaty Mark was. If anyone was going to figure out what was wrong with him, it was going to be the only other person in the dorm that had dealt with the dsease.

“So?” Mark asked. It wasn’t in a confrontational way. He was asking the other what to do. He didn’t know what to do, he didn’t know how to handle this. Even though he was the eldest, he had never been particularly good at figuring out what he needed to do for himself.

“Who is it? I mean, who’s the person?” Jaebum asked. He looked over at him with obvious concern.

It almost hurt how much Jaebum seemed to care about him. Mark shut his mouth, glancing to the side. He’d never vocalized his feelings about Jackson. It had been kind of a nice little thing that he kept to himself. Saying it out loud, he wasn’t sure how to do that.

Jaebum was waiting, looking at him intently. There was no real escaping this, because he needed to get it out to someone.

“It’s Jackson,” Mark whispered.

Jaebum didn’t look quite as surprised as Mark would have hoped he would be.

“Does he know how you feel?” He asked, pushing Mark’s hair out of his face again. It just kept falling into his eyes, and he didn’t have the energy to try and keep it out of his eyes.

“No, and I really can’t tell him how I feel,” Mark sighed.

He was trying to keep himself from sounding as pathetic as he currently felt. It wasn’t like Jaebum couldn’t tell what he was going through. The male was pretty much seeing his past self in front of him. The same stubbornness that seemed to come with the disease. Mark was never someone the other members would describe as being stubborn. He was normally pretty flexible.

Although, Jaebum would have to admit that his flexibility was usually whatever Jackson wanted.

“You can. It may seem hard or impossible. But Jackson does care about you, and those feelings could become bigger. Then you wouldn’t have to have the surgery and you’d have the person you loved,” Jaebum said.

Mark didn’t have the heart to point out that Jackson was most definitely heterosexual. And that life didn’t always work out the way that it had for Jaebum and Jinyoung.

“I’m not going to have the surgery no matter what,” Mark murmured.

“You could die, if you don’t. You know that right?” Jaebum asked, leaning closer to the older male and frowning at him. Mark avoided eye contact and just briefly nodded his head. There was nothing more to really say about that. Jaebum clenched his jaw as he looked at him. But there was nothing he could say, and he could see that on Mark’s face.

He was determined to be in ruin.

“Eventually everyone’s going to know that I’m sick. Can you please not tell Jackson? You know he’d be… You know how bad he would be if he knew that he was the person I loved,” Mark asked, biting at his lower lip as he glanced at the leader.

Unfortunately, Jaebum did know. He shut his eyes and nodded his head.

~*~

Things only got worse for Mark after that talk. He was tired all of the time, he could barely eat and keep something down, and focusing on conversations was nearly impossible with how ill he felt. Everyone noticed that changes in him but no one noticed the flower petals all over the place. A lot of questions were thrown his way, and for the most part, he managed to keep them from figuring out anything.

Jaebum and Mark argued quietly several times. Arguing over Mark telling Jackson, telling JYP, getting help. Mark was unwilling to talk about it in earnest. There was nothing that Jaebum could really do about it but hope for the best.

They were preparing for a performance. Mark felt as though he was going to die right then and there. But he was going to go on stage and hope for the best. Because this is what he wanted to do. He wanted to rap, he wanted to dance, and he wanted to entertain people. He was not going to disappoint their fans. No way in hell was he going to be a disappointment to the fans that supported him so much.

“Are you okay?” Jackson asked, placing his hand on Mark’s elbow as he came up behind the older man. A shiver went through his entire body, hoping that the other male didn’t notice it. He shut his eyes and breathed in deeply, stiffly nodding his head. “You can tell me if you aren’t okay. We can postpone the concert or something.”

“I’m really okay. I’m kind of nervous about going out there though,” Mark said. He breathed in deeply and gave the other a small smile. He was going to go through with it, because he was stronger than everyone thought he was. He was going to go out there, and he was going to do the best he had ever done.

“Okay…” Jackson said, sounding hesitant as he looked at Mark. “But if you need to stop, just let me know.”

“Thanks, Jacks,” Mark said, smiling a little bit as he looked at him. It hurt that Jackson was worrying about him so much. But he had to keep himself in check. It would have been too easy for him to give in and give up.

Four minutes later, they were going on stage and performing for a large crowd. Mark didn’t know how many were in attendance. But he was sure that it was the most that had gathered just for them. He was doing his best, even though his body didn’t feel right at all. It felt heavy, it felt as though his body was on fire. The pain was intense, but he didn’t give up.

They were in the middle of ‘Just Right’.

Mark felt the desire to vomit sneaking up on him, but he kept his mouth shut and continued with the foot work. It was Jackson rapping his second verse, and he was having fun, bouncing around and entertaining everyone. Maybe Mark was staring a little bit too close at Jackson, enjoying him enjoying himself too much.

Because the next thing he knew, Mark was on his knees and vomiting flowers all over the stage. In front of the largest group of people that he had ever performed in front of. He would have been mortified over that, but he was too busy being mortified that he was vomiting flowers in front of seven people that he cared a lot about.

“Is that blood?” A few girls up front screamed. But at that point, the petals had started fluttering around on stage.

“No, they’re rose petals,” another girl yelled, one that was probably closer or had better eye sight. The concert was most definitely over.

Jackson came up behind Mark and lifted him up. He was facing Jackson, his head resting on his shoulder as the smaller male lifted him up and carried him off the stage. Mark didn’t have the energy to move. And he was mortified by absolutely everything. He had started crying. Considering what had just happened, he hoped that no one would blame him for it.

Jackson sat down, keeping Mark in his arms as he ran his fingers against his back.

“Who is it, please tell me who it is? I’ll beat them into loving you,” Jackson whispered, sounding so concerned and hurt. The rest of the group came back, after probably apologizing quite a few times to the crowd.

At this point, the videos were probably already online. People were probably already tweeting a bunch to let people know that Mark had Hanahaki disease and it didn’t look good. It wasn’t normal to throw up that much flowers if you weren’t close to the end.

“Please tell me,” Jackson begged. Mark didn’t respond, just curling more against the younger male. He shut his eyes and tried to keep from coughing up anymore petals. Jackson was rubbing his hand up and down Mark’s back.

“We’re going back to the dorms. They’re going to bring in a doctor to take care of Mark. We can’t really bring him to a hospital because of who he is. But they’re pretty confident that he has hanahaki disease and it’s far along. The only real thing they’re going to suggest is the surgery,” Jaebum said, his voice flat. He wasn’t handling this well, his hand tightly holding onto Jinyoung’s.

Mark just shook his head, he was not going to remove the plant from inside of him.

~*~

“It’s not good,” the doctor said, placing the stethoscope against Mark’s pale chest. There was bruising under the skin that he didn’t remember having. But apparently it had to do with the plant moving around and in general hurting him. “For the main point that the plant inside of him is a rose plant. And roses tend to have thorns on them. And if anything, I tend to believe that it’s growing and puncturing into his organs.”

“How long do I have?” Mark asked, because he wanted the bare bones of it.

“If you don’t have the surgery, probably less than two weeks. It’s growing fast and it’s tightening around your organs fast. Specifically the heart and lungs, which isn’t uncommon. I’d highly suggest having the surgery,” the doctor offered. It was clear that he would have preferred to do this in a hospital. Where he could look better and closer at the damage that was being done. But JYP and Mark had both expressed that was the opposite of what they wanted.

“I’ll think about it,” Mark whispered. But his mind had been made a while ago. He knew that he wasn’t going to go through with the surgery. He knew that he couldn’t do it to himself. The doctor nodded his head, and made his way out of the dorms.

Shutting his eyes, he sighed a little bit and sunk down onto the bed. He was exhausted and embarrassed.

The rest of the group was silent as the Doctor shut the door behind him.

“Who is it?” Jackson asked, for about the one hundredth time. Mark groaned quietly and rolled onto his side. He was handling this the best that he could. But it was getting hard to just continue ignoring Jackson’s question.

“It’s you,” Jaebum stated. Mark moved a lot faster than he probably should have. He whipped his head to glare at the leader. And the leader stared at him, frowning as everyone went quiet.

“Woah,” Bambam said. It seemed to be a generally agreed upon consensus from the group around them.

“Jaebum!” Mark said, his eyes narrowing a little bit as he looked at Jaebum. The leader glanced away from Mark, not wanting to meet his eyes. “You said you wouldn’t say anything.”

“You’re fucking dying, Mark. It’s not some fucking game. You both make out and love each other, or you get the damn plant removed. I’m not going to let you be a fool and throw your life away because you’re a stubborn lover,” Jaebum snapped.

Mark was kind of put into his place. Breathing in deeply, he avoided looking at Jackson.

“We’re going to go… Let you two figure this out,” Jinyoung said. He grabbed at Yugyeom and Jaebum to yank them out of the room. Everyone else wandered after them, until it was Mark and Jackson alone in the room.

“It’s me?” Jackson asked after a few moments. Mark breathed in deeply as he tilted his head to the side, looking at the male beside him. His hand was still resting on Mark’s side, looking at him intently. As though he was trying to figure out what was going on.

“Yeah,” Mark whispered. He leaned back against the headboard and avoided looking at Jackson. He breathed in deeply and dug his fingers into his thigh. A quiet cough escaped him, a few rose petals falling from his lips.

Jackson reached out, picking up the petals that had fallen from his mouth. He inspected it, frowning even deeper.

“There’s blood on the flowers,” Jackson said, holding up his finger. The blood was on the tips of his fingers and Mark frowned a bit. He didn’t know what to say. It wasn’t good though, it was a bad sign of what was going on inside of him.

At some point, Mark fell flat asleep. His body was utterly exhausted. And it helped that he wasn’t looking at his phone, because he had no distractions. He didn’t want to read what people were saying about him. Jackson stayed with him, and Mark fell asleep with his head resting on his chest. His fingers slowly traced up and down Mark’s spine, brushing off the petals as they occasionally fell from Mark’s lips.

“Mark?” Jackson asked, gently shaking the older male. He opened his eyes, letting out a small noise as he looked up at him. “I need to tell you something.”

“Okay,” Mark said, shifting a little bit so that he could lift his head and look over at Jackson.

“I don’t have a girlfriend,” Jackson admitted, looking over at Mark with a frown. Mark stared at him for a few moments, furrowing his eyebrows. “I lied, because Bambam was teasing me about being single for so long. So I lied, to get him to stop. And I don’t have a girlfriend, and I really want to love you.”

“You can’t make yourself love me,” Mark sighed, running his fingers carefully along the other male’s middle.

“I don’t really have to make myself do anything,” Jackson responded, turning his head to look at him. “I’ve always had a crush on you. I just didn’t want to admit that it could possibly become more than that. I could, super easily, fall in love with you.”

“You don’t have to,” Mark whispered, biting at his lower lip. He was aware of how close the other male was to him. Aware that there was only a few inches between where their lips could meet. His heart was pounding inside of his chest.

“I’m going to fall in love with you. Even if you weren’t sick, it was eventually going to happen. You’re too much for me. You’re sweet, you’re funny, and I love the way you laugh. I was eventually just going to fall in love with you. I’m just kind of amazed you loved me first. And that I hurt you. I’m sorry that I hurt you,” Jackson whispered, sort of rambling on. His voice was quiet, which was surprising. Mark breathed in deeply as he listened to him.

Maybe he was lucky after all.  

 

**One Month Later.**

“Is it in bad taste if I get you red roses?” Jackson asked, pressing a kiss against the top of Mark’s head. The pale male was half asleep, shifting a little bit as he tried to hold onto the warmth of him. He groaned quietly, trying to drag him closer so that he could press against him.

“Kinda, probably. I never want to see another red rose again,” Mark yawned quietly. He opened his eyes and looked up at him with a small pout.

“I love red roses,” Jackson teased, leaning down and pressing a kiss against his lips.

“Of course you do,” Mark snorted, swatting at his face to get it away from him. “Your breath stinks, it’s too early for me to be dealing with this.”

“It’s our one month anniversary,” Jackson complained, pressing his face against his neck. He moved his mouth against the side of his neck, laughing a little bit. Mark squirmed, laughing as Jackson continued to press his mouth against his skin.

“Stop! Stop, oh my God. Yes, you can get roses, but get like; white roses or something. They’re harmless, and I didn’t puke them up for a long time,” Mark said, laughing as he managed to stop the other, pressing a kiss against his mouth.

Jackson practically hyena laughed nipping his lower lip.

“Good, it’ll be fun. We’re going to go to lunch,” Jackson murmured. He kissed his nose, before getting up.

“Take me somewhere with good food,” Mark said, curling up under the blankets as he hummed quietly to himself.

“Of course, anything for you… I love you, Mark.”

“I love you too.”

**Author's Note:**

> I really would like to work with a beta or something. I'm going to do a BTS fic next.


End file.
